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Archive for July, 2016

Despite My Limitations

July 29th, 2016 No comments

I will take on the day ahead of me.
I will believe that I can rise above and set the bar higher than yesterday.

I will forget about the one last Harrah! and believe that today is good enough and worth living.

I will believe in that my abilities are enough to get me through the day in a meaningful and worthwhile fashion.

Despite my limitation to love you I will try and dig deep and find a way to love you. Even if it goes against every fabric in my being I will try and find a way to forgive you and think that time with you is a good way to spend time and I won’t be missing out on anything else.

Despite my limitation to accept I will do my best to accept you and believe that the way you want to live life is a good way to live life. And that my way of living life is likely not the best way to live life.

Despite my limitations I will try and learn to love myself and begin to see myself as good enough even if I have been measured against my peers and deemed a failure.

Despite my limitations I will do my best to give my daughter as much as I can and to help her see the world as clearly as possible.

This much, I can begin to see as a starting point – a way of being.
I know I can work hard to not let myself down even if I want to give up and lay my hand down.

Despite my limitations I know I’d be lucky and it’d be great to hear from you,

Matthew R. Polkinghorne
(289)-208-2241

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You’ll Feel Better

July 28th, 2016 No comments

These words circling my head this morning as I awoke.
It pushed me out of bed.

If I go to the gym this morning I know “You’ll feel better”.
If you go to the gym this morning I know “You’ll feel better”.

The workout will get your heart rate going. It will get your blood pumping. It will make you feel better overall and be ready to take on the day ahead of you.

It may not be the easiest decision and there are times when you will feel like you want to give up. But if you stick with it and make your way through the workout “You’ll feel better”.

Now I just have to get there and get the workout going. This is one of the hardest parts – getting there.

I know I can do it. I know you can do it.

It’d be great to hear from you,

Matthew R. Polkinghorne
289-208-2241

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Planes In The Sky

July 11th, 2016 No comments

I didn’t invent them. I don’t build them and I certainly don’t own them.
Technologically, I’m way behind. I simply don’t know how they operate and what makes them work properly.

Because I’m so far behind in the technological race, doesn’t this in effect make my life pointless? What could I possibly have to add to this world that will make it a better place and make me feel like I am a contributor?

After all, I want more than just a paycheck. I want to try and have some sort of impact that will make a lasting and positive difference; maybe even in the lives of others. It’s not that I want my name to be echoed through the ages but there is a part of me that wants to be remembered and I am hoping that my almost 7 year old daughter already has positive memories and images of me.

But there are those planes in the sky. My frustration lingers. Not everyone gets to be Howard Hughes. Not everyone writes the equation to relativity. I wrestle with myself. I fight myself. I try and assure myself that I am living a life worth living and I am living a life that has meaning.

What will today bring? Maybe not much of anything. Maybe something. I am hopeful.

As always, it’d be great to hear from you,

Matthew R. Polkinghorne
289-208-2241

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